


Into Darkness

by redangeleve



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Blind Obi-Wan Kenobi, Blindness, Bombs, Exhaustion, Feelings, Force Bond (Star Wars), Hurt Obi-Wan Kenobi, M/M, Missions Gone Wrong, Protective Anakin Skywalker, Rating May Change
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-15
Updated: 2021-02-14
Packaged: 2021-03-13 09:02:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,415
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28775766
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/redangeleve/pseuds/redangeleve
Summary: Obi-wan is blinded during a campaign and has to deal with the consequences and the growing attachement of his former padawan.
Relationships: Obi-Wan Kenobi & Anakin Skywalker, Obi-Wan Kenobi/Anakin Skywalker
Comments: 11
Kudos: 110





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * A translation of [Into Darkness](https://archiveofourown.org/works/28768929) by [redangeleve](https://archiveofourown.org/users/redangeleve/pseuds/redangeleve). 



Into Darkness

Darkness falls here comes the rain  
To wash away the past and the names  
Darkness falls here comes the rain  
To end it all the blood and the games

(A Call to Arms, 30 Seconds to Mars)

He could already hear it.

The booming sound of the bombers was getting closer and closer. Damn it, they shouldn't even be here anymore. Their units were already retreating, because they had realized that they couldn't do anything with the ground troops here. The defense system of the battle droid factory could only be overcome - if at all - by an air strike. Nevertheless Obi-Wan and Anakin had returned once more behind the enemy lines. To minimize human and material losses, it was essential that they disabled the factory's deflector shields, or the weapons would knock the bombers out of the sky before they reached their target.

But time was working against them. The ships were already approaching and still they had not managed to cut the power supply to the deflector shields. Although they had reached one of the nodes near the dome under which the factory was located and where the high-voltage wires crossed, the fact that they were constantly under fire prevented them from completing their plan and destroying the wires. For what felt like the hundredth time, Obi-Wan fended off another blaster bolt from a battle droid. His arms felt terribly heavy and his whole body was numb and battered from the ordeal of the campaign, so he had to reach out to the Force to keep going. 

With a grunt, he gritted his teeth as he felt the strike of his lightsaber vibrate up to his shoulder. He couldn't give up now. Their men were counting on them. "Anakin, how much longer do you need?" he asked, addressing his former Padawan, who had cut open the hatch of a utility shaft with his lightsaber and was now head over heels in a dense web of electricity wires.

"I'm really close, Master," came a muffled voice from the shaft. "Have a little more patience."

"It's not my patience I'm worried about, but rather that of our friends," Obi-Wan returned nonchalantly, before blocking another battle droid's attack and using the Force to throw it back into the dust.

It was impossible to tell if Anakin had heard him. Still buried deep in the inside of the shaft, the young Jedi was trying to spot the right cable, "Almost there," Obi-Wan heard him say. "Yes ... yes ... I think I've got it now."

No sooner had Anakin spoken than there was a bang, followed by a puff of smoke, then there were sparks flying around from the inside of the shaft, burning tiny little holes in Obi-Wan's cloak. "Anakin!" the Jedi Master shouted with concern, but just a moment later the addressed man climbed out of the shaft, coughing. Though he too had obvious holes in his robe and the sparks also seemed to have singed his eyebrows, he was otherwise unharmed. In fact, Anakin gave the other Jedi a boyish grin before announcing, "Mission accomplished. Now let's get out of here, Master."

He didn't have to tell Obi-Wan that twice. By now, he could not only hear the bombers, he could see them as well. The ships looked like ominous dark shadows as they suddenly emerged from the smoke and dust whirled around by the battle, then they opened fire. 

"Run!" shouted Obi-Wan to his former apprentice, but even without his old Master's warning, Anakin had already fallen into a fast spurt. Light-footed as a gazelle, he leapt over the rocky landscape, debris and the bodies of their fallen men, so that he soon had a fair head start. Although Obi-Wan could also run faster and jump farther than an ordinary human due to the Force, the long battle had exhausted him. Even though he didn't like to admit it, he wasn't twenty anymore and his bad knee was bothering him more than he would have liked.

Behind him, he could hear the weapons firing at the bombers, but their ships were paying the separatists back in kind. Already the first torpedo impact made the earth tremble. Obi-Wan almost fell, but he just managed to intercept himself. Quick. He had to go on. Only a little more. It was not far anymore. Not two clicks away, behind a rocky hill, lay the shuttle that would take him and Anakin back to the Negotiator. 

But it might as well have been a hyperspace jump away. He would not reach it in time. When the next bomb hit and the shock wave knocked him off his feet, Obi-Wan had to admit that it had been a mistake not to tell the men that he and Anakin were still in the danger zone. But he had thought that they would be long gone before the ships arrived. A serious mistake, as it turned out, even more so when a dazzle grenade exploded in the immediate vicinity and bathed his field of vision in a blinding light. Reflexively Obi-Wan narrowed his eyes, but it was already too late. Even behind the closed lids, glaring flashes twitched across his retinas, sending stabbing pain into his brain. 

"Master!"

Anakin's cry came from far away. Presumably the young man had felt his pain through their old training bond and had not seen with his own eyes how Obi-Wan had fallen. Though it took all of the Jedi Master's strength, he sent back calming and encouraging impulses. Under no circumstances should Anakin feel compelled to return. Whether Obi-Wan succeeded in reaching the ship or not, all that mattered was that his former Padawan was safe. 

Clawing his hands in the dirt and crouching on all fours like a wounded animal, Obi-Wan shook his head in an attempt to sort out his senses and force obedience on his body. Though he suspected it was futile, he forced himself to open his eyes again, only to find that he still saw nothing more than blurry flashes. Wonderful, the dazzle grenade had done a good job, but until the after-effects disappeared again and he got his sight back, it could take hours, if ever. He couldn't wait that long. Without hesitation, Obi-Wan sent his mind out to the Force until he had gained enough strength to continue, then struggled to his feet. Based on the impacts, he had some idea of where the factory was and which direction to run, but without his sight, he would be an easy target for the scattered battle droids still patrolling the area.

"Master, are you all right?" 

This time Anakin's voice was close. Damn, so he had come back after all. "I'm fine," Obi-Wan reassured his former apprentice, turning his face in his direction. "Don't worry about me."

"Are you hurt? What happened to your eyes?" Apparently the damage wasn't as easy to hide as Obi-Wan had hoped after all. Inwardly, the Jedi Master cursed Anakin's quick thinking while simultaneously trying to keep his side of their bond closed.

"I'm afraid I've made the very unpleasant acquaintance of a dazzle grenade," Obi-Wan returned as lightheartedly as possible. "Nothing Master Che can't fix."

"Then you can't see anything?" Anakin asked in alarm.

"Temporarily, yes, but I still have my link to the Force to warn me of danger," Obi-Wan tried to downplay his blindness, taking a step forward with feigned assurance only to bump into the remains of a destroyed droid.

"But the Force does not help you perceive your surroundings," Anakin stated. "Stick with me, Master. I will guide you."

"There is no need, Anakin," Obi-Wan immediately protested, before groping his way forward with as much dignity as he could muster. "I can manage."

Another commotion heralded another torpedo impact, and though Obi-Wan had expected it, he still flinched noticeably. If they didn't get out of here soon, it would be too late. "Don't be silly, Master. I won't have you stumbling blindly through a combat zone," Anakin countered, then took the Jedi Master's hand and placed it on his shoulder. "Trust me. I'll get us out of here."

Reluctantly, Obi-Wan clenched his jaw. There were at least half a dozen rejoinders on the tip of his tongue. About how the mission always came first. That it was more important that Anakin made it back to the Negotiator alive than that they both ended up dead. But he knew his former Padawan well enough to know that any further discussion was nonsensical. When Anakin set his mind to something, he would see it through. Besides, their situation was becoming more dangerous by the minute. They were still far too close to the scene. If they didn't reach the shuttle before the factory blew up, they would burn alive here.

Despite Anakin's guidance, Obi-Wan stumbled more than he walked at first, and they made slow progress. Battle droids appeared again and again, which opened fire immidiatly at them and which Anakin had to destroy first, so that they could continue their way. Obi-Wan was no help for him. Although the Force warned him in time when a blaster bolt came his way, he could not do more than parry it with his lightsaber. Destroying the droids was almost impossible without his eyesight. Each of these skirmishes cost them precious seconds. Time they didn't really have, and although Obi-Wan couldn't see where they were, he could tell they were barely making headway. The sounds of battle were still far too close. They would never make it like this. There was only one alternative.

"Anakin, I'm just slowing you down. You have to leave me behind," Obi-Wan implored his former apprentice as he stumbled over another uneven patch of ground. Alone, Anakin would make easier progress. He was a faster runner, and his reflexes in combat were better when he didn't have to constantly watch to keep Obi-Wan out of the line of fire.

"That's out of the question," Anakin let him know, placing his own hand on top of Obi-Wan's, preventing him from letting go. "We'll make it together."

"And if we don't?" argued Obi-Wan. "You must think of the Republic. The GAR needs you."

"And what's about you?" inquired Anakin.

"I am replaceable, but you are not," Obi-Wan tried to explain.

Anakin emitted a sound that seemed to be both a snort and a sigh. "Not for me, Master. I need you."

"Anakin ..." Obi-Wan's exclamation was so soft it was almost a whisper.

"No, I don't want to hear it," Anakin interrupted him sharply before pulling the Jedi Master further. "Save your strength."

In a gesture of silent acknowledgement, Obi-Wan's Force signature wrapped around that of his former student, then they moved on. The smoke around them grew thicker, making both men cough and their eyes water, and the Jedi Master realized it wasn't just because of him anymore why they were walking slowly. Though he probably would have rather bitten off his tongue than admit it, it was becoming more and more apparent that Anakin's strength was waning. Probably defending them while making sure his old Master didn't fall again was more exhausting than he had thought after all. His breathing was heavy and his aura in the Force was flickering, but if Obi-Wan interpreted the incline correctly, they had finally reached the hill. If they held on a little longer, maybe they would make it after all. Stubbornly, Obi-Wan gritted his teeth as he put one foot in front of the other while listening for the sounds of battle behind him. 

The factory's defenses still seemed to be working, as they continued to fire even as the torpedo impacts mounted. Probably it was only a matter of minutes before the whole complex blew up. The way up the hill seemed endless, although the elevation had hardly been worth mentioning in his memory, then they had finally reached the highest point. Hopefully the Separatists hadn't found the little ship.

"Can you see the shuttle yet?" asked Obi-Wan as he fought another coughing fit.

"Yes," came Anakin's pressed reply.

"And is it intact?" the Jedi Master huffed.

"Looks like it, at least," Anakin replied roughly, then grabbed Obi-Wan's hand, which had been about to slip from his shoulder, and held it tightly. "Don't give up just yet, old man."

"Wouldn't dream of it," Obi-Wan returned, but he was breathing heavily as he did so.

The way down from the hill was almost more strenuous than the ascent. Each step created a small stone avalanche that rolled down the slope, and Obi-Wan had to be careful as hell not to slip. But the prospect of finally getting off this planet made the two men mobilize all their strength once again. They had almost reached the level on which the shuttle stood, when suddenly a series of blaster shots was fired from the crest of the hill. 

The Force screamed out, literally warning the two Jedi at the last second. Immediately, Anakin whirled around and tried to push Obi-Wan behind him to protect him from the suddenly appeared battle droid, but the jerky movement caused the Jedi Master to lose his balance, causing him to fall and roll down the slope with boulders and debris. Above himself, Obi-Wan heard the unmistakable sound of Anakin's lightsaber, then for a moment he lost track of where was up and where was down as he tumbled downward and rolled over, the rocks tearing his skin in the process. It seemed like an eternity that he slithered down the hill, but it was probably no more than a few seconds before he finally reached the bottom where he remained lying in a messy heap of clothes and limbs. 

His heart was beating so loudly that he could hear Anakin calling out as if through cotton, but the impact had squeezed all the air off his lungs, leaving Obi-Wan unable to reply. "Master." It took little more than a few seconds for Anakin to sprint down the hill, bringing with him a cloud of dust and dirt. Immediately he was on his knees beside his former teacher, making sure Obi-Wan was all right. "This is no time for a nap, old man," Anakin taunted, after noting that Obi-Wan had come away disheveled and dirty, but unharmed aside from a few bruises and abrasions. Still, his relief was plain to hear.

"Too bad, when it's so comfortable," Obi-Wan returned full of sarcasm, then reached out to his former apprentice and let himself be pulled to his feet. Now that he was standing, he realized that his bad knee seemed to have been damaged in the fall, so Anakin had to support him the last few meters to the ship. 

They had just reached the loading ramp when a huge explosion made the ground tremble. A giant wall of flames shot up several hundred meters and the air smelled of burnt rubber, fuel and chemicals. So after several attacks, the bombers had finally succeeded in blowing up the factory, but with the amount of flammable material that was stored there, this first explosion was only the beginning.

"You have to get the shuttle ready for take off," Obi-Wan urged, as soon as they had climbed through the hatch into the interior of the ship. "Don't worry about me. I'll be fine."

It was obvious that Anakin didn't like leaving Obi-Wan in the cargo hold, but he knew his former Master was right. They may have reached their destination, but they were not out of danger yet. "To your left is an emergency seat. It could be a bumpy ride, so you better try to strap yourselves in before the shuttle takes off."

Obi-Wan nodded in understanding, then released his hand from his former student's shoulder. Once more, Anakin squeezed his fingers encouragingly, then disappeared toward the cockpit. Trembling, Obi-Wan took a breath. Now that Anakin was gone, he didn't have to pretend to be fine. But as much as his body ached, he could not yet afford to collapse. Limping more than walking, and seeking a foothold on the wall of the ship with one hand, Obi-Wan felt his way forward until he found the seat Anakin had spoken of. His hands searched blindly for the strap, just as he sat down with a grateful grunt. It took him more than one try before he found it and the latch finally clicked into place, and not a minute too soon. 

With a roar, the engines came to life, then screeched as they were turned to the limit without a chance to warm up. The shuttle shuddered and bucked before it rose from the ground with a jolt. The sinking feeling in his stomach told Obi-Wan that they were gaining altitude rapidly, yet it wasn't fast enough. The sudden shock wave from the explosion caused the electricity aboard the ship to crackle and some relays to burn out with a pop. A shrill warning tone appeared as the shuttle went into a spin and drifted toward the planet's surface. But the moment resisted only briefly, then Anakin had the ship back under control and resumed their flight into space.

With a feeling of gratitude and at the same time total exhaustion, Obi-Wan leaned his head back against the head piece of the emergency seat. They had made it, thank the Force. In a few minutes they would already have left the planet's atmosphere, where they would then meet the Negotiator, which was orbiting the planet. Until then, there was nothing he could do but rest a little and take care of his battered body. Flashes still flared across his retinas at irregular intervals and echoed painfully in his skull, but nothing could be done about that at the moment. 

Once they were back on the starcruiser, he would have Kix inject him with a stim to relieve the pain; that was probably all the clone medic could do to help his eyes. Either they would heal on their own over time, or they wouldn't. All Obi-Wan could do was have faith in his body and in the Force. It had never let him down before, and it wouldn't now. He was sure about that. With these thoughts in his head, Obi-Wan finally surrendered to fatigue and a few minutes later he was already asleep.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Once again, Obi-Wan made an attempt to get through to Anakin, extending his Force signature to that of his former apprentice and sending calming pulses through their bond. "It's for the best, believe me. I would only put you all in danger."
> 
> "Even if you try to tell me so, but you can't just be replaced, Master," Anakin insisted stubbornly. "We are a team! And you still have your connection to the Force. You could see through me. Through our bond."
> 
> Obi-Wan stroked his bearded chin in surprise. He hadn't thought of that idea before, but while it wasn't without some logic, it was highly unlikely that he could actually see through Anakin's eyes, so he finally returned, "I don't think that would work."
> 
> "Yes, it will," Anakin replied with fervor. "All we have to do is lower our shields and engage each other. Please, Master. Let us at least try."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I thought a long time about writing a second chapter for this story and here it is now.  
> Please let me know what you think about it.

She's got that light around her eyes  
A gleaming star surrounds her mind  
She's got that smile imbued with soul  
I need her hand, 'cause she's my home

(Orange Blue, She's got that light)

Fifteen steps, that's how many it was from Obi-Wan's bed over to the kitchen counter. Seven more from there to the couch and ten to the door. Unlike the rest of the temple, where he needed a stick to keep from bumping into any walls, Obi-Wan was so familiar with the apartment that he could easily find his way around. It was the same one he had lived in since his Padawan days, except that he had lived in the bedroom across from his current one, which Anakin had later moved into. Since his former Padawan had been made a Jedi Knight, however, it had stood empty, waiting for Obi-Wan to take on a new apprentice, but as things stood, the room would likely remain deserted forever.

With a sigh, Obi-Wan felt his way along the wall with one hand while balancing a cup of tea in the other. Although five days had passed since the campaign at the battle droid factory, his recovery had made little progress. Sometimes he imagined he could tell light from dark, and very rarely he thought he could make out the outline of something, but most of the time he continued to live in complete darkness. Master Che had done everything in her power, but probably, despite the flushing of his eyes with a Bacta liquid, immediately after their arrival on the "Negotiator" it had simply been too late to be able to repair the damage.

As hard as it was for him to be condemned to inactivity, Obi-Wan probably could have come to terms with this fate if it had only been for himself, but the constant worry of his former Padawan, that he felt through their old training bond reminded him that his condition also affected those around him. Yet, although he knew how much Anakin wished for positive news, he could only offer him little hope. If his vision had not returned by today, it probably would not do so ever. The members of the high council had probably come to this conclusion as well, since they had called him in for the day to discuss further action.

Since their return to Coruscant, the cruisers with the 212th and 501st Divisions had been circling in orbit, awaiting further orders, but the units were desperately needed. The war wasn't waiting for Obi-Wan to recover, and as things stood, the council would probably have to find a new general for his men before they sent the clones back to the front lines. Even though Obi-Wan was sure this would not please Anakin in the least. But his former Padawan had to learn not to put his personal feelings above his duty to the Republic.

Obi-Wan drank his tea in slow sips, careful not to spill any. He would have to resign himself to staying at the temple and teaching the children from now on. Despite his blindness, he felt the Force within these walls stronger than ever. There was Anakin's raw and unbridled Force signature shining like a beacon, the steady bright glow of the other Jedi, and the flickering pulsation of the younglings whose skills had yet to be trained. It was an important and honorable task, yet Obi-Wan had to admit that his heart bled at the thought of leaving Anakin and his men to go into battle alone. From now on he would no longer be able to protect his former Padawan. Now he would have only Ahsoka to keep him from rash actions. 

May the force be with them.

XXXXXX

"No! They can't do that!" Anakin's whipped-up emotions coursed through their old bond like a whirlwind, making Obi-Wan downright dizzy. After all, he had guessed that his former apprentice would not take the news well, but all the ranting and screaming probably wouldn't change the council's decision.

"Anakin, they have no choice," Obi-Wan tried to reassure the younger man, who was pacing up and down his quarters like a caged rancor. "I cannot lead my unit in my present condition."

"That is not true," Anakin countered. "Your men need you and you alone. They know and trust you, and now they're supposed to be put under the command of another Jedi Master just like that?! I won't let them do that!"

Once again, Obi-Wan made an attempt to get through to Anakin, extending his Force signature to that of his former apprentice and sending calming pulses through their bond. "It's for the best, believe me. I would only put you all in danger."

"Even if you try to tell me so, but you can't just be replaced, Master," Anakin insisted stubbornly. "We are a team! And you still have your connection to the Force. You could see through me. Through our bond."

Obi-Wan stroked his bearded chin in surprise. He hadn't thought of that idea before, but while it wasn't without some logic, it was highly unlikely that he could actually see through Anakin's eyes, so he finally returned, "I don't think that would work."

"Yes, it will," Anakin replied with fervor. "All we have to do is lower our shields and engage each other. Please, Master. Let us at least try." 

As he spoke, the younger man had crouched down in front of Obi-Wan, and the Jedi Master almost thought he could feel his pleading gaze on him, but Obi-Wan hesitated to give him the answer Anakin desired. Even if his former apprentice was right, it would take them very close to the limits of the Jedi Code. Lowering the shields and allowing Anakin access to his mind, thoughts, and feelings, and in turn doing the same to him, would bring them closer than two Jedi were allowed to be. They would have to form a bond that was almost like a fusion, and Obi-Wan wasn't sure that wouldn't cause more problems than it solved. 

Still, the temptation was great to try. If it worked, he would not have to abandon his unit. He would be able to return to his men, continue to keep Anakin from doing something stupid, and oversee Ahsoka's training. He would be able to defend the Republic and stand up to the Separatists and the Sith. He would be able to see again.

Trembling, Obi-Wan expelled the air he hadn't even realized he'd been holding before sending a silent prayer to his late master. If Qui-Gon had been in his place, he would not have hesitated. They may have had their differences, but sometimes Obi-Wan had secretly wished he could be a little more like his old master. He had always encouraged Obi-Wan not to cling to the Jedi Code at all costs, to live in the here and now. Until today, Obi-Wan had never dared to follow his example, but now the point had come when Obi-Wan would take the risk.

"All right," he said with a curt nod. "Let's try it."

In response, a wave of relief, excitement, and anticipation swept through their bond before Anakin regained his speech. "Thank you for your confidence, Master. You will see it will work."

"One thing at a time, Anakin," Obi-Wan replied with a grin as he leaned forward and awkwardly patted his former apprentice's shoulder. "Let's meditate together, it will make it easier to find a common ground."

"Okay ... yes ... as you say." Immediately, Anakin was on his feet to retrieve their mats from the closet and spread them out on the floor, then he led Obi-Wan to his designated spot. The two men slipped out of their boots and outer robes to get more comfortable before sitting down in the lotus position facing each other, so close that their knees were almost touching.

"Ready?" asked Obi-Wan of his former Padawan. 

"You bet I am," was Anakin's brash reply, but it was all the confirmation Obi-Wan needed.

Though he could see nothing, Obi-Wan closed his eyes and took deep, controlled breaths in and out in an attempt to empty his mind and focus only on the flow of the Force. Subconsciously, he felt the mat beneath him, the sun on his face, and the slight pressure of Anakin's knee as he shifted his weight, closing the distance between them. It was not the first time this had happened. In fact, it had happened in countless meditations together before, but on this day it had more than symbolic meaning. The touch represented a bridge, a connection between their bodies before it could come to a connection of their minds. 

It wasn't actually possible, but Obi-Wan thought he felt a warmth flowing from Anakin into him despite the fabric that separated them. It was a pleasant, calming sensation that Obi-Wan focused on as he sank deeper and deeper into the mediative trance, and suddenly he felt not only Anakin's physical presence, but his mind in the Force as well. Even though they had known each other for so many years, it was always breathtaking how much his Force signature shone. As bright and pure and hot as it was, it could only mean that Anakin had completely lowered his shields. He offered himself to him, encouraging him to join their Force signatures, and after a moment's hesitation, Obi-Wan surrendered. It was like a maelstrom, a vortex of the Force from which there was no escape when their Force signatures touched. Like two magnets attracted to each other, they clashed, intertwined, and bled into each other until Obi-Wan could no longer tell where Anakin began and he himself ended. There were so many emotions, joy, fear, hope, anger, love and hate flooding him that his heart was about to burst. 

"Slow down, Anakin," he heard himself say, but the words reached him as if through water. All he heard was the frantic beating of two hearts trying to match each other until they sounded like one, and the ancient melody of the Force filling his head and spreading from there to every cell in his body.

He felt Anakin's hands on his knees, as if the other man needed an anchor to hold him, and suddenly there were memories that were not his, whizzing past him at breakneck speed. Many were jumbled and made no sense, were completely out of context. Others were beautiful, and still others were so disturbing that Obi-Wan's hair stood on end and his chest tightened in fear. Faster and faster the images flew past him, until they were only scraps that reached him, and they blurred into a mush of colors and shapes, so Obi-Wan thought he would be swept away with them. But as quickly as it had begun, it was over and all that followed was darkness.

Obi-Wan couldn't help but feel disappointment welling up inside him. 'It didn't work,' was his first thought, but then he realized that he could still feel Anakin's presence very close to him. Suddenly there was a light. At first it was blurry and out of focus, but after a few seconds it became clearer and Obi-Wan realized with surprise that it was the sun hitting the wall behind the couch in his quarters. Then the image shifted and he saw the table behind him with the vase and flowers Ahsoka had picked for him when he had been in the Halls of Healing. Next to it was the book he had read before he left for the fateful mission and his datapad, the half-drunk cup of tea, and suddenly Obi-Wan recognized his own face, illuminated by the sun falling through the windows before him.

His eyes were closed and there were so many tiny little freckles covering his face down to his beard. His hair shone in the light almost like copper and his Adam's apple moved slightly as he swallowed and Obi-Wan felt a deep affection rise within him that made it more than clear whose eyes he was looking through. His heart beat almost painfully against his ribs and he was more than aware of the hands still on his knees as Obi-Wan pulled back and forced his consciousness back into his own body before raising his shields again. 

As he emerged from meditation to the surface of his mind, Obi-Wan felt a mixture of pleasure and pain that was not foreign to him. This was exactly how he had felt when he had accepted Anakin as his apprentice. He had felt too young and inexperienced to accept a Padawan yet, had been afraid to fail and had missed the guidance of his own master, but at the same time he had known he had no choice. If Anakin was to become a Jedi, as Qui-Gon had wanted, Obi-Wan was his only chance; no other master would have dared to train the boy.

It was the same now.

If Obi-Wan wanted to see again, he now knew he could through Anakin's eyes, but at the same time he had come to realize how deep his former Padawan's feelings for him were. The affection Anakin held for him was close to becoming much more, and if they made that connection again, there was a danger that that very thing would come to pass. 

"You see, it worked, Master!" heard Obi-Wan the enthusiastic exclamation from the younger man. "Now the Council must not take your command away from you."

'Now the Council must not take you from me,' went unsaid, but the Jedi Master heard it anyway.

Obi-Wan sighed silently. As a Jedi, he knew there could only be one right decision. He should accept his fate for the good of the Code, but he did not know if he would be strong enough to do so. For so many years, he had convinced himself that he was above things. That he was no longer the same rebellious boy who had gone against his master's orders and stayed behind on Melida/Daan. But apparently he had been mistaken. 

May the Force be with him.


End file.
